Nov 5, 2011

Honestly.

I wanted to post something cool today. Some post about the latest art piece, or my silly boys, or some such thing. Something funny and smart and, well, maybe not so honest...

So what exactly do I mean by that? Well, like some many others of there, in so many places, things aren't so hunky dorey here. We are really struggling. Questioning every. single. decision we've made in the pat two years. Everything. Not so confidence-inspiring.

Maine is a beautiful place to live, but that's about it. Truly. The pay scale is terrible- I cut my earning potential by ONE-THIRD just by moving here. The job market stinks, just like every where else. Real estate- ha!! We couldn't sell this house if we had to. I wish we could. I really do. My bags are still packed from when we landed almost two years ago.

I'm scared. Every single day. Chris, my amazing husband, is home from school- pumped for a job that isn't materializing.  I still work part time- all the crappy employers around here post for part-time jobs- good luck finding full time.

So now what? I don't know. Keep holding my breath. Keep being stunned that I am almost 45 and in a sinking boat. Keep trying to be grateful for what I do have- at the moment, anyway.

Anyone want to buy a small farm?

8 comments:

Dorthe said...

Dear Lee, I`m so sorry to read this,- and really hope it will be better for you, one way or the other!
In Denmark, it is equal difficult- and here with this kind of shop I have,- I have had a very bad year - and sold so very little, compared with before.
We have to cross our fingers, and hope for the best.
Hugs,Dorthe

cinnibonbon said...

Oh dear sorry to hear this. I wish this wasn't the case for you. Not a whole lot I can say that would help your situation, but with te time sure you and hubby will start to make decisions that will change things. For now now friend please remember you are in our thoughts. Hang in there!!

kandeland said...

sorry to hear this is how things are going for you right now Lee...I hope things start looking up..."try to remember the good stuff" is all I can say I guess (which sounds annoying to hear, but helps me when things are crappy)Hang in there, xo

Shannan Martin said...

It might feel like the boat is sinking, but I know someone who walks across water like it's nothing. :)

Hang on, girl. There's a reason. And when you are able to see what it is/was, I want to hear about it!

Gigi said...

Big hugs!!! I know the feeling. Boy, DO I know the feeling. I wish I knew the answer, but I don't. At this point in time all we can do is just keep going and continue to be grateful for what we do have (easy to say, difficult to do - I know). Keeping you in my thoughts.

Kelly said...

I'm sorry to hear that there are troubles. I know what you mean about being afraid. The job market sucks about everywhere right now. There are people working at WalMart that have their masters. Everyone is scaling down. I'm thankful that I am a nurse and can work in the hospital otherwise we would not make it. Ted was an over the road semi driver. Can't get work and has given up, working on the farm full time. If you have read my sidebar I had a friend Alexandra that lived at the farm and helped out. She got tired of the work and moved. That cut our budget in half and then some. I wish you could sell your house. That burden is frightening. We were able to move to a less expensive place when we came to Maine so we technically downsized. Hopefully something will come along for both of you. My prayers are with you both.

she dreams big! said...

I hear you Lee and feel your pain. Sometimes faith and trust are all we can count on. Oh, and prayers from bloggy friends. Stay strong for just a little longer.

Lili said...

You are stronger than you think Lee. You are surviving here in a very tough place and in a very tough economy with your sweet children and they will always remember the time you spend with them and the love you give them. I see alot of that in your posts. I know it's difficult for you, but I have a feeling you are doing what you can to make the best of these hard times. xo ~Lili