Aug 31, 2012

We've landed

Just a quick note- boy has this past week been a whirlwind!! We moved down to PA a week ago Thursday, back with my parents. It's kind of weird being home, and kind of nice. The boys are sleeping in my old room. Chris and I share my sister's old room. The cats are settling in, as is the dog. There are boxes everywhere, and I can't find anything.

In the past week I've been cleaning, unpacking , organizing (sorta), had a job interview, and meeting with HR the nest day, started the kids in a new school (which requires me to take them to and from every day until the bussing is set up), called my friend to turn down one job, accepted another job, sent my license information off, had a great visit with my aunt and cousin, and went to the Maryland State Fair!! WHEW.

Through all of this, is has been hot- at least to us used to the glory of Maine's summers.

Oh- and we've had 4 showings of the house this week. One (crappy) offer, and a strong possibilty of two more!! woo hoo.

That's it in a nutshell! I hope to be able to post more often, bust out some art supplies, and be creative. But first I have to find my supplies.....

Aug 20, 2012

On Turning 9

In the midst of all of this packing/moving chaos, Jason turned 9. We had a small party here at the house, and a "friend" party at a local party place.

It was bittersweet, because Jason won't see these kids until next summer, and I won't see the parents until then either. I'll really miss some of my adult friends. Finally, after almost 3 years I have some friends I really enjoy...

I'm still feeling a bit confused, a mixture of sadness and apprehension, with some excitement thrown in. You know the Van Halen song "JUMP?" Forget jumping, I'm doing a flying cannonball!!

See you in the water!

Aug 18, 2012

Our Barn is Empty

My barn is empty. My dad came and picked up the ponies and my one, remaining chicken. Anyone who has animals knows how much your day revolves around the routine of the barn. Up in the morning to feed, out before dinner to put them out. Now, it's clean and empty and waiting for the next owner's animals.

The house is getting emptier too. There are boxes everywhere. Most pictures are down and wrapped. Soon I will be cleaning out the refrigerator and the dry goods.

Wow- so much has changed in the past few weeks! I feel like I made the decision to take the job and move back, and now everything is snowballing! Chris will go back with me, at leats for now. He has some job offers. Of course, one was up here... now that we've made the decision to leave. I said as much to him, and his reply was "We're not supposed to be here." (I almost fell over). But that's kind of where I am too. We gave it a good shot- just short of three years.

Now, we just need the house to sell. Our realtor told us that the first 5 weeks of a house being on the market is an indicator of selling it. Well, we've had 9 showings- that's pretty good, right?? But no offers. St. Joseph #1, who helped us sell our other house, got scooped away when the township reshaped the banks on the road (including our front yard). #2 is out there, with wishes wrapped around him. I'm saying a novena... please let an offer come this month!!

I'll be going back to my old job. I'll be going back to my old house (my parents' place). I'll be back in the places that are familiar to me. It should be interesting. Hang on and come along for the ride!!

Aug 12, 2012

BIG changes coming!

Well, after three days of agonizing, I decided to take a leap of faith and gave my notice at work. As some of you suggested, I really thought about the pros and cons, and what was the most important item to consider.

This decision has lead to a flurry of activity! I am applying for jobs, lining up interviews, and trying to get my nursing license re-instated. I am withdrawing the kids from school, registering them in another school, and planning Jason's 9th birthday party. I am still packing up more stuff. I am still purging, Whew! Lots and lots of decisions to make.

The kids and I will head back to my mom and dad's to live until the house sells. Chris will stay here, work, and keep the place going. (We've had 8 showings in 4 weeks, with another schedule for Monday). It's not going to be easy, but it certainly is do-able.

We will miss Maine. But we are up for the next challenge too!

So, I'll try to keep you posted along the way!

Aug 7, 2012

Trying to Find My Way

You know that saying "You can't go home again"? Although I moved out of state and back before, I'm finding that this time it's true.

The first time I moved was after I was married. My first husband and I moved to Boston, where he was in school. A few short years went by. I learned to love Boston after 5 years and feel at home there. But, our marriage didn't last, and I moved back home to lick my wounds. It was difficult, being an adult and moving back with my parents. There were struggles between the child role and the adult role.

I went the nursing school. Moved out to an apartment. It was the first time I lived completely on my own. It was great. Time passed, I met my husband. (We bought a house, married, had a baby. In that order.) I loved that house the minute I saw it. We walked through it, pulled out of the driveway, and I told him "I want this house." We bought it that night.

Fast forward to now. You know the story. Husband got homesick for Maine. We decided to give it a chance and moved here. In hindsight, probably not the smartest move as the economy was already taking a hit. Jobs have been hard to come by. Husband travels a lot. I am homesick. The house is for sale.

So, getting back to the saying, I had last week off and packed the kids up for the long drive back to Pa. to get the lay on the land. I have decided- pretty much anyway- to move back before the house sells. To take a better paying job, to get a work history started, to get the kids enrolled in school. But husband and I have been really struggling with this decision. Are we doing the right thing? Will the kids be OK?

 I had this idea that somehow, by doing this, I would have this moment where I knew. That there would be this shining moment- the clouds would part, the God-light would shine down, the bells would ring and I would know. I thought I'd be super excited, that I'd say to myself "I'm moving home!"

Yeah, that so didn't happen. I felt more confused. Where do we want to live? Where do we enroll the kids? Do I take the job (day/midnight is going to be very difficult). How are we going to all fit in my parents' house- two kids, two adults, a dog,  and three cats? What roles will we have? Who will take my kids to school when I'm on midnight shift, if husband is out of town? The list goes on and on.

I keep waiting for God to tap me on the shoulder. To whisper in my ear, like He has done in the past. But, nothing. Nada. Only the dull roar of my own heartbeat. Of my uncertainty.

Now, that doesn't mean He hasn't. It may mean I am too caught up in my own stuff to hear Him. Did I miss it somewhere? Did I miss it when we moved here? Or am I missing it now? Are we supposed to stay or go?

On one hand, I believe He has a plan for me. On the other hand, I believe that life it what I make it, and He'll be standing right behind me all of the way. I don't know. I'm confused and scared.

So, tell me. What have you done in this type of situation? Do you have any advice? Because I could really use it!

hugs, Lee